It may be true that first impressions are largely determined by outward appearances, but how is it that the average-looking girl is voted homecoming queen, while the class beauty is passed over?  What makes everyone want to be near her? She has a magnetism that attracts people; she’s memorable. When navigating the dating scene, being remembered is key to getting a second look and keeping someone’s attention.

To be memorable, you have to be authentic. There’s nothing memorable about a person who is just like everyone else. If others find you so comfortable to be around that they want to know you better, your relationships will be more plentiful and life will be more interesting. Your career may benefit when you put an emphasis on being more memorable and are willing to go against the mainstream.

Do you ever wonder if you have a sign on your back announcing to the world that you’re attracted to jerks? You know the type. He’s the insensitive one who puts his needs before everyone else’s and is demanding, childish and angry. If you’re the sole financial supporter in your relationship, compromising all of your wants and needs to please him and make him happy, you may be dating a jerk.

Although there may not be a physical sign on your back, it’s likely that you’re sending signals of vulnerability and neediness. But don’t lose hope, there are some things you can do to attract a decent guy.

So you’re feeling more than a little bit attracted, physically and emotionally, to the great looking guy you’ve been dating, even wondering if you could be in love. But do you really know him? When it has been estimated that over one-third of men in the dating scene, whether online or not, are married, it’s an important question to have answered. How can you be sure he’s not married, without paying for a background check? There are signs and hints that can help you learn the truth.

Are you one of the nice guys out there who believes that women only fall for the bad boys and rarely make time for a good guy? Can you relate with the cliche ‘nice guys finish last’? At the same time, women are always asking the opposite question, “Where are all the nice guys?” Seems a little confusing…

You’re the guy in the crowd who isn’t interested in chug-a-lugging beer until you pass out. You’re also not the one who throws the first punch to defend your honor. You’re dependable, average in the looks department, a good listener, trustworthy and loyal. You have plenty of women ‘friends’ and everyone says what a great guy you are and that you’d be a great catch. But even with all the traits that women claim to look for in a man, you’re striking out in dating department. So what’s really going on?

I read an article recently claiming that beauty begins to fade at 27. It made me sad and angry. It’s bad enough many in our society go through life worrying about the size of their thighs or behinds, now we’re being told that there is a specific point in our lives when we begin the downhill slide to ‘old-age’. But even if it were true, does it make a difference when it comes to matters of the heart? Is it possible you have met your soul mate, but because their physical presence didn’t cause you to catch your breath, you missed your chance? If your priorities are for physical beauty, you may end up wasting a lot of time kissing frogs.

Divorce is messy! And dating in the aftermath can be just as difficult. For many, one of the most sensitive subjects to consider when dating after a divorce is children. With over half of all marriages ending within 15 years, it’s even harder to move on when kids are involved. Not only do you have to deal with your feelings of heartbreak and loss, but your children may be especially vulnerable.

Divorce not only destroys a marriage but causes collateral damage to anyone who loves or cares about you and your ex. Children love both parents making them particularly vulnerable, confused and anxious. Kids question who they are, where they came from and where their lives are headed after a divorce. Their hopes for happiness, as valid as yours, need to be taken into full consideration when you begin looking for someone new.

Our first impression of other people comes through our sense of sight, sound and smell. Our sense of touch, on the other hand, is something we hunger for and one of the best ways of communicating our feelings to others. Touch provides comfort and reassurance.

From the moment we are born we crave touch. It is the beginning of how we build self-esteem and a way to increase intimacy. In a romantic relationship, we go through stages of touch that play an important part in the increasing intimacy of the relationship.

The so called ‘cougar’ phenomenon is getting a lot of attention these days. Cougar is the phrase used in dating circles for an older woman who is interested in dating a younger man. The term casts these women in an unfavorable light as highly sexual predators hunting for vulnerable men. Older men in the same boat are given a sweet, father figure nickname – Sugar Daddy.

The idea that this is a new trend can quickly be dispelled by the fact that older women have been hooking up with younger men as far back as ancient Egyptian times. Cleopatra, just one example, married two of her brothers over a period of time in compliance with Egyptian tradition; the first brother was only 12 and she was 17 when they wed.

Incessant talkers, everyone knows one, the person who hogs the limelight and hardly takes a breath between sentences for fear of loosing center stage. Listening to someone’s long-winded escapades or self-congratulatory success stories may be a deal breaker in friendship or love. When it comes to dating, the gift of gab can be disastrous, even if it’s the result of frazzled nerves. 

Being understood is a basic human need that makes room for intimacy and connection. Relationships are built on understanding each other and the ability and willingness to communicate. And the best way to understand the needs of your friends or partner is by listening to them.

A balanced relationship is often described as a relationship of equals. But that is a misnomer. Couples who are looking for equality will struggle with an endless stream of mental arithmetic to keep a balanced scorecard, only to find out that equality is an unrealistic fantasy.

Consider a two-pan beam scale, like the one that symbolizes justice, perfectly balanced. The delicate balance of the scale is not dependent upon the specific contents of each pan. In fact, each side may hold elements that have no resemblance to each other or anything in common. This is a metaphor for a balanced relationship.