Why do so many relationships, romantic or otherwise, begin with the thrill and excitement of great possibilities only to dwindle and fail over time? One reason that is often overlooked is an imbalance of authority and control in the relationship. Or, put in simpler terms - insecurity and neediness. Needy people are often clingy, controlling, possessive, jealous and demanding. Other, more friendly terms we use to describe a needy person are ‘high-maintenance’ or ‘difficult’.

People relate with each other by using three different approaches:  passive, aggressive or assertive behavior. While most of us are familiar with the passive or aggressive nature of a friend or loved one, we may not recognize an assertive personality. People often mistake assertiveness for aggressiveness, but there are some key differences between these approaches to relationships.

Assertiveness is the sweet spot between being too aggressive and too passive. Based on mutual respect, assertiveness is the ability to express yourself effectively and to stand up for your point of view, thoughts and feelings, while at the same time diplomatically respecting those of others. Assertive people defend themselves when someone attempts to dominate them;  they only use aggression in defense of their personal boundaries.

The thrill of opening an email from someone who has found you through a social media or online dating site can be the highlight of your day. Having a virtual stranger find you attractive or interesting can be a real ego boost. But this moment of exhilaration is far from the reality of your desire to establish a serious, long-term relationship, and the exchange will go nowhere if you don’t take action. To reach your goal, you need to know how to make the transition from online exchanges to an in-person date.

Staying active on the dating or social media site is probably the most important factor when trying to hook up for more than a one-night-stand. Anyone looking for a serious relationship will log in regularly and answer their emails. One of the biggest complaints from online daters is a delayed or, even worse, a lack of response from the people they try to connect with. Responding to an email a week or more after the initial contact sends the message that you’re not that serious about finding a partner or that you’re only interested in fun and games.

Ask anyone how important it is that they find the ‘perfect’ partner and you’ll discover that most will say they are looking for compatibility - not perfection - someone who accepts them for who they are and not who they wanted them to be. And although compatibility can be assessed, it is ultimately determined by each individual. So are we looking for compatibility - or perfection?

Perfection is an undefinable characteristic because it is relative. The perfect person to me may be completely unacceptable to you. And as we age our expectations change so that the ‘perfect’ person either needs to change along with our needs or they will no longer fit the bill.

The ability to trust and, in turn be trusted, is an important aspect of our identity that defines how we relate to other people. When another person can confidently rely on your character, strengths and abilities, you have gained their trust. This is especially important with loved one’s since trust forms the foundation for successful, long-term relationships, something we often take for granted.  So how do you build trust and maintain a happy, healthy relationship? Here are some tips:

It takes a leap of faith to be trusting. In any type of relationship, there are different levels of trust: assurance that what you say will be kept in confidence, a promise of fidelity, or the ‘for better or worse’ marriage vows. You may have fleeting thoughts of mistrust for example, about cheating or that you can’t show your true self for fear of rejection - these are normal human emotions. But when there is an unresolved, persistent lack of trust or an intuitive sense of betrayal, a rift is made in the intimacy of the relationship, even if there is no evidence to backup this feeling.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could know for sure if that special someone was really into you? Mixed signals, like constantly calling, staring or flirting with you in a group situation, and then ignoring you in public or not asking you on a date can make it difficult to figure out.

People show their interest in the opposite sex as instinctively as male peacocks display their large colorful tails while performing a dance for the female. But the displays are not always so obvious. You’ll need to develop your listening and observation skills to interpret subtle hints. Look for the following signals to see if they might be into you.

This is my first post and I wanted to personally welcome you to our new blog! Please bookmark us and visit us often! My staff of writers and I are here to help with all your love and relationship needs:

Single and looking for love? Let us point you in the right direction by providing helpful online dating tips, creative first date ideas and other useful suggestions for singles. We’ll help you avoid common mistakes so you make a good first impression and find your true love!

Newly dating with hope for the future? Love is starting to blossom, but things could go wrong fast. We’ll help you keep things on track so your relationship lives up to it’s full potential.

In a relationship and going the distance? Make love last by following some tips and advice from our experts. Let us show you how to make things interesting and keep your love going strong.

Long-term relationship trouble? Relationships can be difficult and it’s easy to get caught up in “traps”. Let us show you how to avoid common pitfalls so you can find love and happiness again.